I didn’t get into Pittsburgh until 6 this morning, I was supposed to be in at 2. Here’s the story, told in a satirical way so you will smile instead of thinking “Wow this post is nothing but a bitch fest.”
I have a love/hate with a passion relationship with Greyhound. Love it because its cheap and convenient; they have buses that go everywhere I want to. Hate it with a passion because they’re never on time, and they really don’t give a shit about it.
My bus was scheduled to leave at 5:50, I got there about an hour or so ahead of time so. Good.
Now the thing with Greyhound is they’re always at least 5 minutes late; I’ve come to accept that, and five minutes really isn’t a big deal. So when 5:55 came, I wasn’t worried. I passed the time talking to other passengers, forming alliances, getting to know them because I am a young (and ridiculously attractive) young woman traveling alone; and no matter how tough I am, there is always someone tougher. Though I seriously doubt that because not only am I attractive I’m also a pretty scary person to deal with when wronged or cornered. I have no problem kicking someone’s ass if they pose a threat
Time passes, the bus still hasn’t come…its now like 6:15. Now as I said, its customary for Greyhound to be at least 5 minutes late, and sometimes they’re even 10 or 15. But it was getting closer to 20 and I was getting a little agitated.
I go up to the information window, having faith that in this modern day and age of computers and other sorts of nifty technology that they would have a way of finding out where the bus is or something. I ask the gentleman if he had heard or knew anything about where the bus was. His reply needs to be recorded in the great books of observation and wisdom: “It’s late. I’ll be here sometime.”
Thank you sir. I don’t know what I would’ve done had I not had you’re brilliant skills of observation and your ingenious vocabulary and knowledge. I don’t know why someone with your great communication skills is working as a clerk in the Greyhound Station.
The bus ended up being, not 20 or 30 minutes late…but an HOUR. Now it would have been okay…had I not had to transfer in Philadelphia. The bus to Pittsburgh was scheduled to leave at 7:40 we didn’t get into Philly until 7:45. I was watching it leave as we pull into the station.
The only other bus that was scheduled to leave for Pittsburgh was a 12:20 bus. I found this out through the kind gentleman that unloads the luggage and does other things…I’m not sure what but he was very sweet. The reason I found out from him was because the little insect behind the counter was a total waste of oxygen molecules. I went up to explain my situation and he told me that because I had a ticket I had to wait. I was next in line, and he took this person behind me. Normally I’m a civil and meek person, I will only speak up when I see an injustice. This was an injustice. I stated very calmly that I while I had a ticket, I was in a conundrum and needed to know when the bus was going to arrive in Pittsburgh; I was getting on it, and they would’ve have to call the National Guard to stop me. He said “Ma’am you need to calm down and step back so I can help the other customers.”
I couldn’t just let that go so I said “You know what you do that, earn that massive salary that you clearly deserve.”
So here I was, stuck in Philly…in the bus station…for almost 6 hours.
The most effective way for dealing with bus stations can be compared to the Serengeti plains. You must make yourself the top item on the food chain in order to survive your stay;
if you are unable to do so, I suggest you sit near a door or stay in the bathroom until your bus leaves…just watch out for the hookers. Scout out your surroundings, make sure that you are aware of what’s going on and whose where. Claim and mark your territory…not in the way an animal does so…just pick a spot and sit down; place a bag or something next to you, trust me you don’t want anyone sitting next to you unless you know them. Watch out for the scavengers, creepers, and other predators.The other predators won’t bother you if you appear to be confident and strong, but the creepers and scavengers are usually suffer from bats in their belfry and poor social skills…they also smell bad. Deny them access to your personal bubble.
This bus arrived on time, and I behaved like a small child at Christmas. One must take in the small pleasures in life when traveling
I arrived in Pittsburgh extremely tired but safe and I had all of my belongings.I call that a successful trip.
Now off to New York for another adventure…and of course provide you dear reader with more stories.
